If you can`t think of anything funny about São Paulo, think about English teachers. Aren’t they funny creatures?
These teachers are everywhere in the city. Anyone with a decent level of English (which may vary) and no shame can do it. You are still in college and have no job, do you know English? There you are. You lost your job and have nowhere to go? Do you know English? Why not to teach? You are 18, just finished your English course and have no idea of what to do with your life? I wouldn`t be surprised if you are offered a job at the very same English school you just graduated. The hours are flexible, you`ll find job offers anywhere, at any time (and chances double by the beginning of the semester)… it`s not that bad, is it?
Have you ever noticed how English teachers are always so confident? You can ask them anything and they deliver the answer right the way. They might not know what they`re talking about, but they seem to know everything from the top of their heads.
What about “okay”? This tiny simple word haunts almost every teacher. I only say “almost” because if it isn`t “okay”, it`s “right?”, “understand?”, or something like that. So the teacher gives a detailed explanation of what the heck the students are supposed to do in that exercise. Then, sweating nervously - but never showing so, of course – he asks the students: “okay?” And he will stare, no kidding, STARE at the students until they finally say “okay” back. They probably don’t have the slightest idea of what the teacher just said, but they always answer “okay” and the teacher breaths out. It`s part of the ritual. Deep inside they know the teacher is about to freak out if they simply stare back with their customary puzzled expression. They instinctively say the magic word and the class may continue.
So you turn to your basic students: “turn the page but don`t unfold. If you are student B, though, you unfold the page but do not show student A. Student A will ask the questions that only student C has the answers, but student C don`t answer, only student B. Then student B asks students A and C the questions from the unfolded part, not the A part. Student C will then add the score and the students with least points at end of questionnaire C wins… okay?” Okay! The students will then do whatever they think they should and will soon learn to ignore the teacher`s instructions.
